I Wanna Go Fast

Grab your ear plugs and get ready to rumble. It's go time for the Midgets. Of course, by referring to Midgets I am in no way shape or form using the term in a disparaging way toward little people.

The Chili Bowl is back in T-Town through this Saturday, the 14th. Hard to believe but this is the 21st time the O'Reilly Chili Bowl Midget Nationals have taken place in our backyard.

Emmett Hahn and Lanny Edwards have organized the four-night race since 1987. The event is so popular in the racing community they will stretch it into five days this go around.

The Tulsa Expo Center, one block west of 21st and Yale, once again will be transformed into a racer's paradise. We have found a good use for our excess of Oklahoma red clay.

This spectacle is not for everyone. However, it is undeniable the exhilaration it brings to speed junkies. Kids and adults of all ages pack the Expo Center all week long.

The entrants for this year's competition come from near and far. More than 50 of the approximately 280 entries hail from California. Defending champion Tim McCreadie comes back to defend his title by way of the Big Apple.

Past winners such as Tony Stewart, Sammy Swindell, Cory Kruseman, Dan Boorse and Tracy Hines will challenge on the quarter-mile oval track as well. Twenty-eight states will be represented.

Even a driver from the land down under will be on hand to give it a whirl. Toni Kruck represents all the Bloke's and Shelia's.

The Grand Marshal is none other than A. J. Foyt. His name is synonymous with race fans spanning several generations. Let's just hope he doesn't get irate and slap any drivers or officials.

Foyt is the only driver to win the Indianapolis 500, the Daytona 500 and the 24 Hours of LeMans. Jean Girard and Ricky Bobby would be proud.

Still not sold on the prospects of watching left turns ad nauseam?

Why not let Randy tell you himself: "I'm also excited that one of my Outlaw Sprint car sponsors, Penthouse Magazine, will be extending their support by sending a Penthouse Pet to the race to be my special guest. If you ask me, the heat will be on in more ways than one!"

Olivia Kent, the August 2006 Penthouse Pet will be autographing headshots during the festivities. Behave over there and quit Googling.

If this is too much to swallow, we always have the toned-down-by-comparison Hooter's girls ambling about. Good times all around.

When you have nothing left to say -- then stop talking right? So I leave you with this gem from Talladega Nights: "I don't know what else you want me to say to them. And I'm also gonna need to know where your commode's at."

Good luck to all participants. Here's hoping a local boy will bring the Golden Driller trophy back home where it belongs or at least will have its big brother close by. For more information and times visit www.chilibowl.com.

From Oval to Round

Did you know the Harlem Globetrotters won 8,829 games in a row from 1971-1995? Me either. Just thought this information was too valuable to withhold from you.

Moving right along, college basketball's conference play is underway. What have we learned after watching our teams battle through the non-conference season?

We have three categories and I love to categorize.

First up is the - "They are who we thought that were" group. This one includes Oral Roberts and Tulsa. The Golden Hurricane lost to both Arkansas and Oklahoma.

However, their dismantling of ORU was unexpected. TU's 9-2 record heading into C-USA places them in a fantastic position to forge ahead to March Madness.

The Hurricane must get continued production from their underclassmen. David Crow and Charles Ramsdell are keeping up their end of the bargain. The astounding play of freshman Ben Uzoh has been a huge plus for this team.

The Golden Eagles entered Mid-Con play with a mediocre 7-7 record. Several losses were head-scratchers. However, the team managed to take down the mighty Kansas Jayhawks at Allen Fieldhouse in Kansas.

Besides, the guys are committed to making the tournament and winning games once there. Everything else is for show. As long as Caleb Green and Ken Tutt find a third wheel to alleviate some of the scoring burden -- this team will be fine.

Second category is the "Boy, that escalated quickly... I mean, that really got out of hand fast" which has the Oklahoma Sooners written all over it.

You know who the best player on the court for OU is right? Courtney Paris. The men's team could use her size on the low blocks for sure.

Actually, the Sooners could use just about any help they can get. They may have a new coach in Norman but the ugly, defense-first play remains their calling card.

Our third category belongs to Oklahoma State. "You come into our house -- you should get your behind kicked." The Cowboys have been better than advertised.

The combo platter of JamesOn Curry and Mario Boggan has proven to be quite the one-two punch. They are the second highest scoring duo in the nation. Once the Pokes regain some bench depth (loss due to injuries), they will contend for the top spot in the Big 12.

Pros Throes

Thanks to the Dallas Cowboys very own bobble boy Tony Romo, all home favorites won in the Wild Card Weekend. This is in stark contrast to a regular season in which underdogs went a spectacular 39 games over .500.

And you wonder why you can't beat the bookmakers. What does all this mean? Keep your money in your bank account. But if you must, take the home favorites in the Divisional Round.

Shake and Bake!