Happy Pamper

We all know the phrase, "Don't hate me because I'm beautiful."

That goes double if I paid $6 for my hair cut.

We've all lost 30 percent or more of our retirement accounts. Gasoline prices are on the uptick, ready to stick it to our summer vacation and back-to-school budgets. Job security in Tulsa isn't as bad as it could be, but no T-Towner can deny that the more-or-less 7 percent jobless rate is on his mind as he puts on his extra-fancy pants to head to the office each day.

Even so, we still want to be pampered. Thanks to local cosmetology colleges--there are nearly 100 in this land where the wind goes sweepin' down the plains--it's possible to get the latest beauty treatments without tapping the cash value of our life insurance policies.

Speaking of beauty, that sneer on your face isn't exactly photo-worthy, dear reader. I'll have you know that beauty colleges ain't what they used to be. Forget the visions force-fed to you by popular culture of dingy, smelly cattle calls populated by inept students with pink hair (the beauty school dropout scene in Grease coming to mind?). What's available now rivals upscale spas and ritzy nail parlors, a far cry from some converted basement reeking of perm solution.

I, too, am guilty of turning up my nose at the student-driver spa experience. One day last fall, I was pretty much forced onto the massage table at the Broken Arrow Beauty College Cosmetology Education Center (CEC for short), on Tulsa's new Main Street at 11122 E. 71st. My grandmother bought me a spa facial there for my birthday, and she bought herself one so she could accompany me. How could I not go?

I admit it. I called my mother to ask if she'd noticed anything about ol' grams being "off" lately. A free ride to the local beauty school isn't exactly a typical wish-list item, especially for me. I'd been a spa devotee for years, having spent hundreds, maybe even thousands, on pedicures and haircuts and foil highlights.

I'd spent just as much dough sending family and friends to the same place for their birthdays, Mother's Day, graduations, I Just Like You and Happen to Not Have Spent All My Money Before Payday Day, whatever.

Honestly, I was peeved. I don't give and expect to receive, but I sure as hell expected better than what I was visualizing: Me, strapped to a metal chair with some mystery goop turning me into a lookalike of the Creature from the Black Lagoon.

Then the day came, and I went to CEC. For a renovated auto repair garage, the place is gorgeous. The private facial rooms are a slice of heaven. I sat back and nearly fell asleep as the technician played some soothing music and rubbed my face down with myriad creams and lotions that smelled as warm and soothing as the low lighting.

The tech didn't even poke or jab me or submit me to her evil science experiments, and she most certainly didn't melt off my face with a mystery mask.

I haven't been able to find a sparsely populated waiting room at a cosmetology college since I officially converted from spa slave to beauty school Betty. My visit to Clary Sage, a branch of Community Care College at 3131 S. Sheridan Road, was no different. The mammoth salon floor--39 stations total--was abuzz. One woman was being treated to a hand massage and lemonade while she waited. She looked happy, let me tell you.

The cosmetology education industry is counter-cyclic to the economy, said Clary Sage campus director Christen Brummett, and the proof is in the pudding. Enrollment is up at the school, and so is the number of clients who come through the door. Men and women are lining up for massages, facials and spa parties to celebrate weddings and birthdays, and the 256 students at Clary Sage see 60-100 clients at the school per day.

"People still want to feel pampered, but they probably don't want to shell out $120 to go to the salon," Brummett said.

The CEC has been inundated with requests for mani-pedis (for the cosmetologically unversed, the act of getting a manicure and a pedicure at the same time), so much that the school has been forced to turn away walk-in requests during hoppin' times. Orders for cuts and colors have gone through the roof, too, Sells said, keeping the 50-or-so students there busier than ever.

The cost of salon and spa services at both schools averages at about half the price as posted by local high-end joints. We're talking spa pedicures for $25 (at CEC), specialty manicures for $10 (at Clary Sage) and even services like bikini waxing ($15 at CEC; sorry, no Brazilians at the schools) and microdermabrasion ($25 at CEC).

Head to Clary Sage for all your massage needs, since the standard 30-minute massage is less than $1 per minute. If spa-level cash is burning a hole in your wallet, though, spring for the 60-minute hot stone massage for $50.

Esthetics rooms (where all the real magic happens: facials, sunless tans, even eyelash extensions) are private at both schools, and at Clary Sage, the only school in T-Town that offers massage instruction, those rooms are private, too. All waxing happens behind closed doors, so feel free to yelp.

Cosmetology colleges aren't just for those of us looking for a deal on spa services and haircuts. They're also a solid option for men and women forced to return to work by strangled cash flow at home, as well as for kids looking for a way around the student loan debt that seems to go hand-in-hand with matriculation at a four-year university.

While traditional college students are shut away for five or so years, the full-time cosmetology student at can earn his or her degree in a year at 30 hours per week. Part-time is 20 hours per week, and it's a year and a half from start to finish.

Clary Sage prepares students for higher education, including further trade learning at Community Care College and bachelor's degree-awarding schools.

"That way, students can prepare to open their own salons or business," Brummett said.

While tuition at these schools isn't cheap--it's about half of what students are paying to attend Oklahoma's state universities for four years for one year's worth of class time--there's plenty of financial aid out there. Plus, graduates hit the field with a lot of control over their income. Sells has heard of graduates pulling in anywhere from $12,000 to $100,000, depending on how much and where they find placement.

Walk-ins are generally more welcomed at cosmetology colleges than they are at salons, but if you think about it while you're still at home or at the office, call ahead and make an appointment. As you prepare to be pampered, let your credit cards know they have the day off, too.