More and more research and counseling sources note that when something awful happens to a person, that person gets better a lot sooner if he or she can talk about it to family and friends. If not, then you find out who your family and friends really are, especially family. It takes a lot longer, if ever, to get over something traumatic, when they keep telling you to shut up when you try.
Whether it’s war, rape, fire, flood, assault, maiming injuries, tornado, torture, or whatever other violence man and nature can do to a person, if your family jeers at you when you try to get it out, they aren’t really your family. Not any more. They’re no better than the bully down the block. If just one of them calls you regularly to see how you are doing, then that person is your family. None of the rest matter.
There’s something basically and morally wrong about a family that has trained itself not to care about one of their own when the worst happens. And when they act like this is the godly thing to do, maybe your God dies, too. Along with all your religious holidays. You may find that whatever God is proud of that kind of caring, is not one you would want to spend an eternity with. From then on, you will have to find your own reasons for living. Nothing will ever be the same again, if it ever was. "